I live with my family who eat a regular western diet (or maybe slightly healthier becuase of me). They eat few and eat mostly storebought. They are not interested in being healthy.

That's fine becuase they don't care and I can't do anything about it (I tried). However I want to be different. We always eat dinner together, and they don't exactly make kale salads. Tonight is salmon noodles with 'things' like refined wheat noodles, soy sauce, fish farm salmon, honey, etc. If there's anything I'm trying to avoid, it will crop up in significant amounts from once a week to every night. They go out for dinner/lunch almost once a week, and it isn't nice to order salads at restuarant when everyone else indulges.

They say they can't order takeaway for dinner, or make 'fun stuff' more often because of me. Where can I draw the line between healthy and social? If they go out for ice-cream, I won't go.

I don't have any conditions and have been 'different' for about a year (lots of nutritious food, little junk).

  • Do you have any other goal than 'being different'? Are you overweight, or do you have any issues caused by diet? If they support your goal, then they are more likely to get their support in your actions.
    – BKE
    Jan 3 '17 at 17:01

(Note: I'm well aware this question will probably be closed because it's not related to exercise and is primarily opinion based, but I'll try and help anyway)

First off, well done on deciding to clean up your diet!

Unfortunately, there's no easy solution to this, it just comes down to compromise. You say you've tried changing their diets and they don't care about it, I'd be interested to know how you tried. I've always found that gentle nudges are much more effective than large pushes, and playing the long game can usually be successful.

By that, I mean that instead of standing in front of your family and yelling "You all eat rubbish and it's killing you!", try making small changes that they won't necessarily notice. Change the soy sauce for a low salt variety and see if they notice the difference, try rice noodles instead of the refined wheat variety (it's an arguable difference), add in some veg to the noodles to up the nutrient value a bit.

All of this does necessitate you being able to have an input in the cooking process, either by helping make the food, or by being able to request small changes to the meal.

As for the ordering a salad when dining out, there are other options besides salad, such as changing chips for vegetables, ordering a side of seasonal veg instead of the burger bun, etc, etc. They're simple substitutions that most restaurants are happy to make for you. (I actually don't see the issue ordering a salad when the person opposite me is dining on a burger and chips, but then I'm used to getting odd looks for my food choices).

If they're complaining about not being able to order takeaway or make "fun stuff" because of your food choices, then I'd suggest either cooking something for yourself on the evenings they want to order takeaway, or learn to cook and show them that healthy doesn't have to be boring!

Lastly, since this is more of an ongoing question than a simple Q&A style one, which is what StackExchange is primarily for, I'd suggest trying to post the same question on a forum such as https://www.reddit.com/r/Fitness/. People there are generally good at offering advice about how to get around problems such as yours.

Good luck!


Trying to find a compromise is usually not going to work. It's better to eat meals separated, so that you won't bother them and they won't get in your way. You can always make suggestions to them about how they can make their food more healthy, but whatever they do will likely be light-years away from the minimum standards you want to stick to. This way you'll respect each other boundaries which will help to keep harmony within the family.

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